Thursday, June 19, 2008

Father...or dad?

If you are anything like me you sometimes just wish you could talk to your dad.

My dad left when I was 8 and was never really a part of my life till I was in college. By that point I had a relationship with Christ which taught me about forgiveness and allowed allowed me to do it. Over the years we worked to re-connect and establish a relationship. No longer was he just my "father" but he became my "dad". Things were going great and our relationship was growing. He was becoming a part of our family. My wife and girls loved him dearly. Then, he died a few years ago. There was so much I still had to learn from him. Stuff I wanted to do with him. Just thinking about it and typing, the pain of losing him begins to resurface. I long to just sit and talk with him sometimes. Maybe to go for a trip together since we never did that. To spend a few more hours in the shop together, so that I can really pay attention and learn the skills of woodturning. My father-in-law has also died...so he isn't there either.

Through all of this I have learned that God truly is my heavenly Father. He IS my DAD. It's not a formal "father/son" relationship. No, He is the real deal and he loves me for who I am. I am an image of Him. When those feelings of missing my dad creep up...I wonder, is that how God feels about me. Does He miss me that much when I wander off and do my own thing? I am drawn to turn back and just unload how I am feeling...and He always loves me back. He is waiting for me, preparing my path back to Him. He continues to bless me just as I do to my girls. There may be times when I get frustrated with my girls, but I NEVER stop loving them and longing to be with them. If I know how to do this...how much more does my Heavenly Father...my dad.

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